This should read,”I am not a perfect man and I have me many mistakes. To anyone I have ever hurt, I apologize deeply and unreservedly.”

Why are real apologies so hard?

Oh, that’s right, because to really apologize, one needs to fully accept one’s wrongdoing.

This whole Ryan Adams thing is just another turd sandwich at the “Separating the Artist from the Art” buffet. I really did like some of his stuff. The Taylor swift cover album was meh, but that’s another story.

Part of me still loves Michael Jackson. All of me wants to lock R. Kelly up. I don’t know why it differs from artist to artist, but after I starting reading about the allegations against Ryan Adams, I’m hoping the criminal justice system punishes him to the fullest extent of the law. Graphic texting and phone sex with an underage girl is just gross.

And I’m sure in this case it doesn’t help that someone I used to be involved with was a huge Ryan Adams fan, or that said individual was basically a walking case study for #metoo. It wasn’t until after our relationship ended that several young (early 20s and in a couple cases high school-aged) people told me stories of his making them uncomfortable with his comments or looks. I have no interest in whether or not he’s changed, but I certainly hope he has.

Plus, the Adams allegations made me remember the time he went on a weekend trip to see Ryan Adams in the city he eventually moved to to live with one of the women he was cheating on me with. It was all such a weird, manipulative time in my life. I was working three jobs. I was trying to keep my head above water. In the end, his leaving was the nicest thing he ever did for me.

So all this Ryan Adams stuff just felt a little too on-brand. It’s all just a cycle, I suppose. The manipulation, the fights, the making up, the manipulation. It’s like a song he wrote about being young and sad and high. It’s all a cycle.

It was just a little too on-brand.

Cover photo by Brynden on Unsplash

Comment